“In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or to step back into safety.” – Abraham Maslow
I was listening to a teaching at the weekend, and the above quote caught my attention because I realized that if I want to achieve all my God given potential, I must continually step forward into growth. Doing nothing (or remaining in my comfort zone) is not a choice I can afford to make because it is a disservice to my Creator.
Maslow argued that “What human beings can be, they MUST be.”
So, he wasn’t talking about a mere wish or desire. No, according to Maslow, you have a NEED to “self-actualize” — to express your latent abilities and live your full potential.
Just like your lungs need oxygen, your mind needs self-actualization, or it will suffocate.
Deprived of it, you might not gasp for air, but you will experience other painful symptoms like stress, anxiety, or even depression.
If you want to feel truly fulfilled, you need to realize your potential.
I often get asked,” Nneka, how I can discover my potential?” It is only after you have discovered what you believe your potential is, can you begin to act towards realizing your potential. To help you discover what your potential is, you have to ask yourself what truly makes you come alive, and then do those things.
You can start by reflecting on questions like these:
- What did I spend time doing as a child?
- What activities absorbs me so much that I forget to eat and sleep?
- If money wasn’t an issue, what would I spend my time doing?
The answers to those questions, will begin to give you an idea of what really makes you tick, and what you should spend more of your time engaging in.
Maslow says that it is in continually making choices to step forward into growth do you become fulfilled, because you are now taking steps to bring to bear what you were originally designed to be and do.
Nothing in life is constant – you are either growing or disintegrating. For example, if you are not applying your brain to anything, you begin to lose your retentive memory. If you are not exercising your body regularly, you are gradually losing your muscle mass. Accepting this reality helped overcome my natural tendency of desiring to stay in my comfort zone. It also helps to overcome fear of not taking action.
Taking the right action means that you have making a choice towards growth regardless of the perceived outcome, rather than retreating into safety. Interestingly not doing something, does not mean you are static, but rather, are retrogressing.
In every moment, you are faced with two options – every positive choice – stepping forward into growth counts for something, while every negative choice – stepping back into safety (comfort zone) counts for something. Let’s assume you score +5 points when you make a positive choice and -5 points when you do nothing. Think of the choices you made in the past month. If we are to tabulate these points – where do you stand +100 or -200 points? A net positive will result in a feeling of success and fulfilment (even though you may not have arrived at your desired goal – but you see progress). A negative score will typically result in an unexplained sadness, despair. Can you identify with any of these feelings?
If you think you are in the red, or very low on the positive end, it’s not too late to end the year, with a feeling of accomplishment by making daily choices to move forward into growth. When your alarm gets you up at 5am (because that is what you really want), don’t press the snooze bar – get up and do your devotion, or exercise, or whatever you planned to do. When you are at a party and just been offered some scrumptious looking desserts, and your goal is to lose 20Kg before the end of the year, make the choice to say “No, thanks” (that’s growth).
Growth is making small choices that you know will move you closer to your goal. Just like a plant does not become a tree overnight, have the realistic expectation that your transformation or your goal will not be achieved overnight, but through the momentum that is gained through making many small right choices of growth.